You’re just not there.

Come_Back_To_Me_1600x1050_by_Dmaghar

I have so much to tell you, But you’re just not there.
And I realize that you’re not coming back.
I try to convince myself, But I can’t find the words.

I wanna tell you I finally did it, I accepted myself.
I made peace with all the demons that I emprisoned in my head.
Everyday I’m excited for all these changes in my life.
I wanna share everything with you, but you’re just not there.

I wanna tell you I got this contract we both talked about.
They opened their arms to me and welcomed me like a brother.
It’s incredible how people just want me to  speak my mind.
I want you to live that with me, but you’re just not there.

I wanna tell you my hands started shaking again
And when they shake follow smiles and tears; people feel my writings.
But, would you even bother? You’re just not there.
Therefore I try to convince myself, But I can’t find the words.

My friends expect me to be stronger, but they don’t know.
They don’t know how sad and desperate I am for losing you.
I’ve been looking for myself so long, that finally someone found me; It was you.
You took me to an emotional lift; There, and back again.

Maybe that’s why I see you everywhere, you’re everywhere.
I see you in Van Gogh’s paintings, in Beethoven’s Für Elise.
It’s funny but I actually counted the number of short haired girls in town.
But the situation don’t allow me to see you, I hate separations.

I wanna tell you that my eyes can’t see without yours looking at me.
I wanna tell you that my heart beat is deranged without you next to me.
I am just a silly poet; “Look at it, touch it, eat it but don’t swallow it.”
I realize that you’re not coming back, but it’s so hard to turn the page.

I have so much to tell you, but you’re just not there.
And even if I can’t find the words to explain why you left so brutally.
I leave my door wide open, in case you ever come back.

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